I'm in need of miracles. In a way that I don't think I'd ever thought that I would need them.
What keeps me going some days is the knowledge that all of this, too, shall pass (drowning in a house with my ex that we can't sell, being sued over an old apartment lease that I thought was settled, scraping by as a freelancer so that I can stay home with our daughter, leaky roofs, hospital bills...the list goes on).
Sometimes it feels like I'm being punished for the things I've done and the choices I've made, and the small part of me that used to understand and accept this penance is FED UP. Enough is enough.
In need of prayers that everything will be okay.
We have leaky roofs too, and still paying off a business loan that we haven't even had the business for like 7 or 8 years. I just always look on the bright side of things.....10 years ago we still had bills and probably something else wrong with the house, but we had each other and food on the table. Ten years from now, we will still have bills and probably have to redo most of the house, but we will still have food on our table and each other. There really is no reason to stress about such things...as that is all they are is THINGS. None of us are going to die or anything because we owe a ton of money or our ceiling and walls get a little wet. Just have faith and keep a smile on that face. If you smile as often as you can and even just smile and say "hi" to everyone you pass....it makes things seem a little brighter every day! Love ya
Posted by: Cathy | October 04, 2011 at 04:41 PM
I am saying a prayer for you Autumn. I know it sounds very trite, but two years ago I was having the same feelings (surely, two weeks after officially resigning from my job my car died - had to buy a car, and I started getting what ended up as 15k of medical bills in the mail). Some how, some way, things started getting better. Not perfect, but better. Hang in there. I love Daphne's beautiful photos.
Posted by: Jessica Roberts | October 06, 2011 at 04:43 PM
Hey cousin :) I don't think God works that way--with "punishments," etc. but that he does put things in our path that are for the best, and he's always working out things for good for those who love him.
That said, I've been feeling very very sorry for myself lately as well. Very discontent. Adulthood just kind of sucks. You can work your butt off non-stop and have "nothing" to show for it. It doesn't seem fair, but at least we're not occupying Wall Street, right?
Posted by: Amanda | October 21, 2011 at 09:49 AM